Thursday, October 19, 2006

Today is slap a co-worker day.

Today is the official Slap Your Irritating Co-workers Holiday: Do you have a co-worker who talks nonstop about nothing, working your last nerve with tedious and boring details that you don't give a damn about? Do you have a co-worker who ALWAYS screws up stuff creating MORE work for you? Do you have a co-worker who kisses so much booty, you can look in their mouth and see what your boss had for lunch? Do you have a co-worker who is SOOO obnoxious, when he/she enters a room, everyone else clears it? Well, on behalf of Ike Turner, I am so very very glad to officially announce tomorrow as SLAP YOUR IRRITATING CO-WORKER DAY! There are rules you must follow:

* You can only slap one person per hour - no more.
* You can slap the same person again if they irritate you again in the same day.
* You are allowed to hold someone down as other co-workers take their turns slapping the irritant.
* No weapons are allowed...other than going upside somebody's head with a stapler or a hole-puncher.
* CURSING IS MANDATORY! After you have slapped the recipient, your "assault" must be followed with something like "cause I'm sick of your stupid-a$$ always messing up stuff!"

* If questioned by a supervisor or police, if the supervisor is the irritant, you are allowed to LIE, LIE, LIE! Now, study the rules, break out your list of folks that you want to slap the living daylights out of and get to slapping.....and have a great day!


At Thursday, October 19, 2006 10:14:00 AM , Blogger Sammy and Joe said...

Well there goes my whole day, as I will simply be walking around slapping each one of morons I work with.

At Thursday, October 19, 2006 12:30:00 PM , Blogger emetic sage said...

oh man -- joc better watch out!

At Thursday, October 19, 2006 2:38:00 PM , Blogger Jocular Schlemiel said...

How about a kick to the groin? I'd kick Sage if he actually had anything goin on down there.

At Thursday, October 19, 2006 6:07:00 PM , Blogger Code Name: Ryan said...

damn it. i didn't stop by the page today until after work. hey, you wouldn't happen to have any of my coworkers' home addresses would you??!

At Thursday, October 19, 2006 6:23:00 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

too funny what happens if I'm a SAHM?? does that mean I can slap the hubs ???


At Friday, October 20, 2006 9:12:00 AM , Blogger March to the Sea said...

ryan - sorry I don't know your co-workers!! haha.

RR - ummm sure in theory he "IS" a co-worker.

At Saturday, October 21, 2006 6:22:00 AM , Blogger Hotwire said...

does Hallmark know about this holiday?


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